we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
