if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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