I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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