i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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