How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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