there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
