I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
