I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
