Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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