Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
