i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
