Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
