it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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