Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
