Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Randomize
