wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
