ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
