Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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