So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
The air was thick with penises
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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