how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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