wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize