That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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