I want to have your abortion
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
