You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
