some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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