one might say we're banned from that church
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
did i walk over a car last night?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
