wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
