spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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