I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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