just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
you traded sex for a burrito?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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