PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
