wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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