party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Randomize