I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
operation have a gay friend backfired
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Randomize
