Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
