so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
