I think i peed on brittanys purse
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
