Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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