just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize