he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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