How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
I am puke
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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