dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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