I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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