in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
