1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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