My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
