You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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