i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
