her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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