I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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