ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
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