ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
